Great Dad Jokes

My son told me he didn't understand cloning. I told him, "that makes two of us."
My wife is threatening to leave me because I’m addicted to wearing a new T-shirt every half an hour. I said, "Wait, I can change!"
I've got this awful disease where I can't stop telling airport jokes. The doctor says it's terminal.
I sleep with a bat under my bed. Just in case someone breaks in and wants to learn about echolocation.
Why did the communist only use lower case letters? They hate capitalism!
Whoever invented the knock knock joke should get a no-bell prize!
I have a pen that can write underwater. It can write other words too!
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