Great Dad Jokes

I buy all my guns from a guy who calls himself "T-Rex." He's a small arms dealer.
Without a doubt, my favorite Robin Williams movie is Mrs Fire.
I saw my wife, slightly drunk, yelling at the TV: “Don’t go in there! Don’t go in the church, you moron!” She is watching our wedding video again...
Someone was shot with a starter pistol at the track. Police believe it was race related.
Dwarfs and midgets have very little in common.
I bought a dog from a blacksmith today. As soon as I got home it made a bolt for the door.
My friend said they didn't understand cloning. I said, "that makes two of us."
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