Great Dad Jokes

My wife is still mad at me because I accidentally put superglue on her pen a few days ago. She just can't seem to let it go.

I think the girl at grocery store register likes me. She's always checking me out!

I hate cliffhangers because

Do backwards poets write inverse?

It's muggy outside, but inside it's burglary.

Dad: *washing car with son* Son: Dad, can’t you just use a sponge?

So I knocked over a stack of glasses at the optometrist today & everyone turned around. I guess it was a spectacle.