Great Dad Jokes

Whoever figured out the 'days of the month correspond with your knuckles' thing had too much time on their hands.

Why are there no knock knock jokes about America? Because freedom rings.

My wife always says the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. I love her to death, but she's a terrible surgeon.

To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing!

I just found out my friend has a secret life as a priest. It's his altar ego.

You can throw an envelope as far as you want, but it’ll still be stationery.

A cop left a nice note under my wipers to let me know I'd parked my car correctly. It said "parking fine".