Funny Dad Jokes

Know what goes great with a Coronavirus? Lime Disease
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna One, Anna Two
I made a playlist for hiking. It's got music from Peanuts, The Cranberries, and Eminem. It's my trail mix.
Went to the store to get eight cans of sprite. When I got home, I realized I only picked seven up.
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me old, and handed me his iPhone. Well, the spider is dead, but his phone screen is cracked now!
The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked. Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"
I've run out of toilet paper and started using old newspapers instead. The Times are rough!
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