Funny Dad Jokes

Know what goes great with a Coronavirus? Lime Disease
I made a playlist for hiking. It's got music from Peanuts, The Cranberries, and Eminem. It's my trail mix.
Went to the store to get eight cans of sprite. When I got home, I realized I only picked seven up.
I've run out of toilet paper and started using old newspapers instead. The Times are rough!
The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked. Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me old, and handed me his iPhone. Well, the spider is dead, but his phone screen is cracked now!
I tried to come up with a joke about social distancing, but this was as close as I could get.
Top Users
  • Florida
  • Dad Joke Master
Share
Looking for more laughs? Check out Post Randomonium!

× Error! Your nomination was declined. You may only nominate 10 posts per hour!
× Success! Your nomination was accepted. The post will be considered for the Hall Of Fame!