Funny Dad Jokes

The English language would be horrible without conjunctions. No ifs, ands, or buts.
I wrote a book on penguins, but in retrospect, I realize that paper would have been easier.
I buy my guns from a T-Rex. He's a small arms dealer
As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself... "This takes me back"
Before my surgery my anesthesiologist asked me if I'd prefer to go with gas, or to get hit in the head with a boat paddle. It was an ether/oar situation.
Chickens like to draw, but a cock'll doodle, too.
What do you call it when a bunch of crows go camping? Murder within tent.
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