Funny Dad Jokes

A new study shows that listening to Queen albums can actually be bad for your health due to their unusually high Mercury content.

What is a pirate's favorite musical note? The high C!

Would anyone be interested in being my companion? Asking for a friend.

My kids grew up and don't listen to me anymore. Now they’re just somebody that I used to no.

I was just at a plastic surgery addict anonymous meeting. I was disappointed to see a lot of new faces.

Shout out to anyone who doesn't know what the opposite of in is.

I got the words “jacuzzi” and “yakuza” confused. Now I'm in hot water with the japanese mafia!