Funny Dad Jokes

Historians have proved that people from every zodiac sign survived the sinking of the Titanic… Except Leo

You can throw an envelope as far as you want, but it’ll still be stationery.

I saw an ad that read: “TV for sale, $1, volume stuck on full.” I thought to myself, "I can't turn that down!"

How do you stop Canadian bacon from curling in the pan? You take away their little brooms.

I accidentally gave my wife a glue stick instead of chapstick. She still isn't talking to me.

I made a website to cheer up depressed tennis players, but the servers are still down.

How did the hipster drown? He went ice skating before it was cool.