Funny Dad Jokes

If Satan ever lost his hair, there would be hell toupee.

Why did the communist only use lower case letters? They hate capitalism!

Mom used to feed me alphabet soup because she said I really liked it. I didn't though, she was just putting words in my mouth.

I went to the zoo the other day and saw a caged baguette. The sign said it was bread in captivity.

What's the best thing about living in Switzerland? I don't know, but the flag's a big plus.

Dwarfs and midgets have very little in common.

To the thief who stole my antidepressants, I hope you're happy now.