Corny Dad Jokes

What did one plate say to the other? Dinner is on me.

I accidentally drank invisible ink. I'm in the hospital now waiting to be seen.

Does Hawaii allow loud laughs, or just a low ha?

What do you call a doe with no eyes? No eye dear!!

What do you call a belt of watches? A waste of time.

Why did the wizard’s wife have hickeys on her neck? Because he was a neck-romancer.

My brother had to quit his job as a weightlifter because he wasn't strong enough. He handed in his too weak notice yesterday.