Corny Dad Jokes

A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get for you? "Pop", goes the weasel.

My son tried coffee for the first time today and said it tasted like dirt. I told him, "it was just ground this morning!"

It’s a five minute walk from my house to the bar. It’s a 40 minute walk from the bar to my house. The difference is staggering.

How do you say "'Sup Dog?" in Japanese? Konichihuahua

My friends claim I'm the cheapest person they ever met. I'm not buying it.

I married my wife for her looks, just not the ones she's been giving me lately.

The line for beer at this party is terrible, but the punchline is even worse!