Corny Dad Jokes

My parents always tell me their world doesn’t revolve around me, so I guess that means I’m not actually their sun.

Unfortunately, my obese parrot just died. It is, however, a huge weight off my shoulders.

I hate terrible massages. They just rub me the wrong way.

I went to the store the other day to by some camouflage pants, but I couldn't find any.

You know what the leading cause of dry skin is? Towels.

The people in Dubai don't like the Flintstones. But the people in Abu Dhabi do!

I wonder if glass coffins will ever catch on. Remains to be seen!