Corny Dad Jokes

The barber had just closed right when I got there. I didn't make the cut.

We might be going snorkeling this weekend but I'm not holding my breath

There's something wrong with my touchscreen, but I can't put my finger on it.

I admit, I was wrong about how good my chiropractor is. I stand corrected.

A vegan told me people who sell meat are disgusting. I said people who sell fruits and vegetables are grocer.

I think the girl at grocery store register likes me. She's always checking me out!

Two drunk guys were about to get into a fight. One draws a line in the dirt and says, “If you cross this line, I’ll hit you in the face.” That's the punch line.