Corny Dad Jokes

My wife is still mad at me because I accidentally put superglue on her pen a few days ago. She just can't seem to let it go.

What does a house wear to a party? Address

The guy at the tuxedo store kept hovering around me, so I asked him to leave me alone. He said, "Fine, suit yourself."

My daughter wanted a bouncy castle for her birthday. The rental was $50, and the set-up fee was $1000 dollars. That's inflation for you...

I asked the officer how the hackers escaped. He said, "No idea, they just ransomware."

My car battery just quit working. I guess it had a terminal illness.

We might be going snorkeling this weekend but I'm not holding my breath