Dad Jokes

They say you are what you eat... well, today I bought some ready to eat chicken and when I got home, sure enough, I was ready to eat chicken.

How did the Romans cut their hair? Answer: With a pair of Caesars.

Why did the ketchup blush when they opened the fridge? Because it saw the salad dressing!

I have been so bored without any sports due to COVID-19, so I have resorted to watching worms getting killed in my back yard by birds.... The Cardinals are leading the Blue Jays 5-3

What’s the difference between COVID-19 and Romeo & Juliet? One’s a Coronavirus and the other is a Verona crisis.

My Wife is freaking out about the coronavirus. She made me promise I'd put the mask on before I left for work this morning. Now I'm two hours late and I'm not even a fan of Jim Carey.

I tried to come up with a joke about social distancing, but this was as close as I could get.