Dad Jokes

Remember when plastic surgery was taboo? Now if you mention Botox, no one even raises an eyebrow.

Maybe aliens haven't visited yet because they looked up reviews on our solar system and only saw 1 star.

If your house doesn't have numbers on it, that's something you need to address.

My wife is mad that I keep introducing her as “my ex-girlfriend”

My wife just said, “It’s over”, started walking out on me, and I just sat there. I really enjoy watching the end credits.

Why do ducks have feathers: to cover their butt-quack!

The Fast and The Furious 10 title should be dedicated to Paul Walker. Fast 10: Your Seat Belts.