Dad Jokes

Are people born with a photographic memory? Or does it take time to develop?

Disney is releasing a version of Tangled with an alternate ending where Rapunzel's hair isn't chopped off at the end. They're calling it the uncut edition.

When lego stores open back up it will be insane. People will be lined up for blocks.

How do you measure a red hot chili pepper? You give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh, now.

A man called his twin brother from prison. He says, “hey remember when we were kids and use to finish each other’s sentences?”

What do you call a misbehaving spaceship pilot? An Astro-naughty!

Went to the store to get eight cans of sprite. When I got home, I realized I only picked seven up.