Dad Jokes

My friend couldn't afford his water bill. So I sent him a get well card.

People who rob jewelry stores and banks are pretty bad, but people who rob bakeries really take the cake.

How do you get a farm girl to go on a date with you? A tractor.

I was kidnapped by a gang of mimes. They did unspeakable things to me.

Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.

There is a mysterious crime spree going on at our local IKEA. The cops are still building a case, but are having a hard time putting the pieces together.

What do you call fake potatoes? Imitaters