Dad Jokes

Why did the wizard’s wife have hickeys on her neck? Because he was a neck-romancer.
What do you call a belt of watches? A waste of time.
#678
Florida
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna One, Anna Two
My car battery just quit working. I guess it had a terminal illness.
How do trees go online? They just log-in.
A sheep dog tells her owner she found all fifty sheep. Her owner says that there should only be 46. The dog says, “but I rounded them up.”
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me old, and handed me his iPhone. Well, the spider is dead, but his phone screen is cracked now!
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