Dad Jokes

The barber had just closed right when I got there. I didn't make the cut.
Wanna know why bees stay in their hive for the winter? 'Swarm
At the grocery store: milk - check, eggs - check, tomatoes - check. Clerk: Sir, please stop writing separate checks for every single item.
If two rival car dealerships had a shared parking area, they would have a lot in common.
Don't throw your tissue away there, its snot recyclable.
I couldn’t decide how much lettuce to buy, but my wife helped me think through it. Two heads are better than one.
How did I get out of Iraq? Iran
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