Corny Dad Jokes

Never trust math teachers who use graph paper. They’re always plotting something.

I thought I spotted a leopard once, but it turns out they’re born like that.

I wrote a book on penguins, but in retrospect, I realize that paper would have been easier.

I buy my guns from a T-Rex. He's a small arms dealer

As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself... "This takes me back"

The English language would be horrible without conjunctions. No ifs, ands, or buts.

Before my surgery my anesthesiologist asked me if I'd prefer to go with gas, or to get hit in the head with a boat paddle. It was an ether/oar situation.