Corny Dad Jokes

I once met a drunk ventriloquist who I think wanted to hook up with me, but I wasn't sure if it was her or the beer talking.

I asked the judge to shorten my sentence and he interrupted me.

Why is being a dwarf not all that it is cracked up to be? Because 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren't happy!

To the thief who stole all my cans of red bull, I don't know how you can sleep at night.

As a baby I was too large for the stork. I had to be delivered by a crane.

I recently sued the airline after they misplaced my luggage. I lost my case.

What do you call a nervous javelin thrower? Shakespeare