Dad Jokes

I hate cliffhangers because

I think the girl at grocery store register likes me. She's always checking me out!

My wife is still mad at me because I accidentally put superglue on her pen a few days ago. She just can't seem to let it go.

Face is a four letter word, but preface is a foreword letter.

A mime broke is left arm in a bar fight and got arrested. He still has the right to remain silent.

My wife called me apathetic, like I should care...

My doctor said I have a serious problem with vocalizing my emotions. I can't say that I'm surprised.